Job Adverts For Dummies

There’s a hidden skill to the art of writing a job description. Recurring themes include:

  • Obscuring the actual role under so much jargon that no-one cant work out what the job actually entails
  • Making seemingly mundane jobs sound like the adventure of a lifetime

Deciphering adverts can be a potential minefield, so with that in mind I’ve compiled a handy list of job jargon and its corresponding English translation:

  • “Business Development” = Sales
  • “Account Manager” = Sales
  • “Dynamic” = A lack of understanding of the actual definition of dynamic
  • “Key Accounts Manager” = sales
  • “OTE” = Sales with the added bonus of wondering whether you’ll be able to cover your outgoings
  • “Empowering” = Getting other people to do things you wouldn’t do yourself for little to no incentive
  • “Core Values” = nonsense we’ve made up to sound less like a soulless machine
  • “Unsociable Hours” = Kiss your social life goodbye
  • Growth Manager” = Sales

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